there are things i want to write about, even talk about right now that i’m overwhelmed by and a little scared of. but i’m a sissy, and i can’t seem to get my head on straight enough to formulate any kind of coherent …. anything. i feel like the little character inside the snowglobe …. someone bigger that him, that he can’t see picks up his globe and shakes it for no reason he can fathom. everything that used to be solid is now flying around and hitting him in the face, blinding and overwhelming him. he’s maybe experienced this before, and he knows that everything will eventually settle, but the lines of his life will change, and everything will drift for a while before it settles.
i just hope i’m in the drifting stage and not still in the shaking.
let me also say that i know the one doing the shaking, and i know he’s not doing it just for kicks. every season and every storm will make sense someday, and i’ll laugh at myself and at how dense i was that i couldn’t see the very obvious point the lord was making. my humanity causes me to quake in the face of so much change all at once, but my theology doesn’t allow me that luxury. if i believe that everything comes from the hand of the God who created me, gave his son for me, and does all things for his glory and my good- then i know things are getting shaken up because they need to. and i also know that every piece of snow- every detail in my world- will land right where he wants it to. i’m thankful for that …. and now i’m trying to be thankful (and faithful) IN it.